Etched Lyrium
by your.lip.balm
Summary: Three years after that wonderful night, Hawke and Fenris finally faces the truth, the pain, and the passion.


**A/N: All Dragon Age 2 characters are owned by Bioware, except for the first name of Hawke.**

**Etched Lyrium**

The night's cool breeze brushed my cheeks with their refreshing touch and sent sensations of serene calm to my sore muscles. My body relaxed; my shoulders free from the heavy dragonscale armor, my legs fitted with thin trousers that folded in front of my torso, my long dark wavy hair unrestrained down my back, and my tired hands clasped around my legs. I gazed out into the peaceful surface of the Waking Sea, watching the motionless waves lap soundlessly against the sides of the tall cliffs that shielded the Wounded Coast. The beam from the distant moon cast glittering shafts of light that danced on the top of the still waters creating a scene that was extraordinarily beautiful.

My thoughts began to drift, floating from one image to another coalescing into a single picture. The achievements that I had strived for became evident as they flashed across my mind along with the past three years. Many things have come to pass; some that had been bad and others that had proven good. My journey from a cast off peasant to the Champion of Kirkwall, was an unbelievable feat. One that I had not foreseen, but gladly accepted. Between surviving politics, brandishing crime, and maintaining order, there has been nothing else that has occupied my precious time.

I lifted my fingers and brushed them to my lips, barely aware of my small movement amidst the trance that had taken over. Realization abruptly entered my jumbled mind in the form of an emotion that I had felt many times, but relentlessly pushed to the back chambers of my heart. Duty to the safety and future of Kirkwall had blocked that path that had been created three years ago. I have felt a stirring in my chest more frequently now, especially in the presence of him. He has asked to accompany me on the tasks that have been appointed to me, whether it be a day or two traveling to Sundermount to aid the Dalish or as small an errand as going to the Chantry and speaking with the Grand Cleric. He always has expressed interest in my affairs, but has become more attached and thoroughly curious and concerned about me. Although, he tries to hide his emotions behind his cold, morose demeanor, I soon realize that his mask of stone easily shatters when he thinks I am not paying attention.

Rubbing my fingertips to the softness of my lips, I wonder if he still thinks of that night, so long ago. The memory of it has lingered on the fringes of my mind, haunting my sleep, distracting my thought process, chasing away my hunger and appetite; burning my heart with a famished longing that craved for another taste...another night.

_Oh, Fenris._

I raised my eyes to peer at the fathomless night sky. Small pinpricks of light dotted the vast blanket that covered the sleeping world. Underneath the immense atmosphere, I suddenly felt small and lonely. Lost in a place that was both familiar and strange, peaceful and chaotic.

"You are shivering," a deep voice spoke quietly next to me. I was so startled from the sudden noise and appearance that I gasped, a dry sound that dissipated in my throat. So engulfed in my dreamy daze that I did not notice the night had grown colder, causing my skin to break out in bumps and my body to tremble. My gaze found Fenris's large green ones and a swift blush burned my cheeks. Concern mirrored in those two emerald orbs of viridian fire. His silver hair shone white underneath the light of the moon framing his handsome face. The lyrium that was branded into his skin glowed faintly like veins of brilliant light that gleamed with an eternal luminescence.

Fenris wrapped me in a blanket which he did with quivering hands and then sat next to me in silence. He did not wrap himself in a blanket, so he must not be cold. I concluded that his trembling was not related to the night chill. The awkward hush went on for several minutes and when I could stand it no longer, I broke the stillness with an inquiry.

"What will you do when we return to the city?"

His gaze drifted over the Sea beyond and answered in his familiar troubled voice.

"I will follow you as I have always done."

I stared at him with disguised interest, trying to read his expression to discern what he was thinking about, but I failed. His face was stony and void of emotion. Disappointed, I looked away toward the calm waters and became silent. After some time with the both of us sitting next to each other in anticipated silence, Fenris finally spoke, his voice different and strange.

"Lillei, I am sorry."

"For what?" I asked, appalled. I tore my eyes from the breathtaking view, and watched his stunning elven features contort into confusion and then rendered with pain. The abrupt change surprised me.

"For leaving you that night," Fenris revealed and looked at me. Agony glimmered in his dazzling eyes. "I should not have. I should have explained to you how I felt, but instead I ran away. I am a coward."

His revelation shocked me, because it was so unexpected. He had never wanted to talk about that night and I did not press the issue, because I wanted him to talk to me when he felt comfortable to.

"Fenris, you are not a coward," I replied, gently. He shook his head as his stare remained on my face.

"I never allowed anyone to get close to me, because the fear of getting hurt would be unbearable. And so in order to shield myself from the pain, I fled instead," he answered, anguish in his voice. "And for a time, I did believe that."

"It's only when you let someone in, that you will discover something you have needed," the words escaped my mouth without me realizing it.

"I hated for leaving you, but in fact, I hated myself for being me," he said, in a bitter tone. "And then I came to a different conclusion. I ran away not because I feared getting hurt, but because I was afraid of inflicting pain onto you."

"What?" I inquired in disbelief. "You can never hurt me."

"But I could," Fenris said, sadly. Stunned, I stared at him with incredulity.

"I do not know the extent of what Danarius has branded into my skin, but you have seen the outcome many times. I do not understand the whole of it, and what I do not understand I will not be able to control."

"What are you saying?" I asked in a flourish. "That you might accidentally end up killing me in battle?"

"Yes. That is exactly what I am saying," Fenris confirmed eyeing me with a distressed gaze.

"But you do not know that!" I countered angrily. "Besides that does not matter, because you are not going to kill me!"

"Of course it matters!" he blurts out in defiance and then pauses briefly. "_You_ matter to me! If you died and I was the cause, I do not think I could ever forgive myself or..._survive_."

His words pierced my heart so deeply that the anger previously surfaced dissipated. My eyes widened at the astonishing affection of his words and then softened as love bloomed in his green gaze.

"You are the only person that has seen me for what I am and not looked the other way. Still you have accepted all of me; the etched lyrium, the outcast elf, and the Tevinter slave," he said, gently and with apparent and undisclosed passion.

"You are not a slave," I replied with ardor. "You are Fenris, and you are the one that I love," I whispered and felt fondness sluice through my beating heart. He smiled and even in the darkness, I could see the desire that overcame him from the way he stared at me with hungry shimmering eyes and the way he drew closer wanting to touch but unsure of what the outcome may be.

Without hesitation and with a ferocity that swiftly grew to unsated want, I leaned over and pressed my lips to his. The abrupt touch sent instantaneous yearning that rippled through my body in pleasurable waves. His lips were moist and soft, the wetness fueling the longing ache within me. Fenris drew his hands up to grasp my face in a demanding caress that incited a soft moaning from my throat. His fingers then trailed a burning path down my shoulders and finally wrapped around my waist, pulling me taut against his leather tunic. I felt the heat from his hot breath as he tore his mouth from mine and traced his lips down the side of my neck. My own fingers raked through his silver hair as his luscious lips returned to devour mine once again. Apparent and complete pleasure contributed to the kiss. It was long; full of erotic bouts of candid bliss, intense burning passion in the form of rough fondling and frequent ardent liplocking. It was several minutes later before we pulled away, our chests heaving to and fro but clearly discontented. I wanted more and I could see it brightly in his own eyes, but we both knew that we could not progress further intimately with the others so near. It would have to wait until a later time, perhaps when we reached the confines of the city.

A lingering smile played on his lips as he stared at me with vivid lustful eyes, the greenish hue flickering like candles. He grazed my face with his hand. The soft touch of his fingers on my cheek was warm and inviting.

"I have missed you dearly. You have never escaped my mind," Fenris whispered, his deep voice soothing me and at the same time, exciting my body. "I could only hope that this moment could have come sooner, but now that it is finally here, I do not want it to end."

"I will always be here for you should you need me," I breathed and seized his hand. The glowing lyrium on his skin glistened softly, creating a faint light that shimmered between us. The gleam of appreciation and love in his eyes were answer enough.

**©yourlipbalm 2011. All rights reserved. Distribution of any kind is prohibited without the written consent of yourlipbalm.**


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